We are now officially into December, which means Christmas music is fair game. Go ahead and tune in that station on your radio that plays Christmas tunes 24/7. We started the Christmas dance party at our house this afternoon. It will continue, Christmas ale willing, for the next 3 1/2 weeks.
And the song we were all jonesing for was ... "Christmas Is the Time To Say I Love You," by Billy Squier. Why? Because it's the best Christmas song. Ever. No debate. Sorry. If you disagree, it's because you're wrong. It rocks, it's sentimental, it's Billy Fucking Squier. Enough. Why are we still talking about this?
And in case you were curious, here are the top 10 Christmas songs, ever.
1. Christmas Is the Time To Say I Love You, Billy Squier. We alread settled this, above. Just crank it up, dance around, and enjoy.
2. Fairy Tale of New York, The Pogues. I have to confess I quite like the KT Tunstall version, but you have to give credit to the original, and the Pogues are the ones who introduced us to the seamy, underworld side of the holiday. And for that we owe them a huge debt.
3. Do They Know It's Christmas, Bandaid. It was for a great cause, and it's a great song. If your favorite '80s artist was not involved, they were probably not worthy of your admiration. It's catchy, and you love to sing along to it. No, it's not snowing in Africa. It's not going to. That's not the point. But please, don't play me the remake, which is Christmas Shoes bad.
4. Father Christmas, The Kinks. You could make an argument this should be higher on the list. You can't make an argument it should be lower. Father Christmas, give us some money, don't mess around with those silly toys. We'll beat you up if you don't hand it over. Let's not pretend anyone else gets to the heart of the matter more succinctly than the Kinks.
5. Christmas Wrapping, The Waitresses. Technically, they might not be a one-hit wonder, but we'll wait for you to name their other hit. This is the one still paying their mortgages. From the subtle bells to the tell-tale guitar, by the time they crank the bass intro you're already dancing. It's been rocking Christmas for 36 years now and there are no signs of it slowing down any time soon.
6. Please Daddy Don't Get Drunk This Christmas, John Denver. Confession: I grew up on John Denver, and this song was always a favorite with me and my sisters. No, my dad didn't get dead drunk every Christmas Eve. It wasn't personal. We just loved it. The only reason you don't is you didn't grow up in a John Denver household. Not my fault. Ever heard of YouTube? Get on it.
7. Christmas Ghost, Manic Street Preachers. Christmas is perhaps the most nostalgic time of the year, and this song is pure nostaglia for my generation. It is Christmas in the '70s. And it rocks, because that's what the Manics do.
8. The Twelve Days of Christmas, Bob & Doug McKenzie. Speaking of nostalgia, this song used to be a holiday staple. Now you might hear it once every December. Let's face it, the original Twelve Days of Christmas ... sucks. It deserved to be parodied. And the McKenzie brothers did it up right. Give me a beer in a tree, and you can keep most of the rest.
9. Santa Claus Is Coming to Town, Bruce Springsteen. If you listen to any classic rock station anywhere in America, you will hear this repeatedly in December. And that's okay. The Boss got it right.
10. Grandma Got Run over by a Reindeer, Elmo & Patsy. It's funny. Laugh. Even if you're a grandma. But maybe keep an eye out walking home. You never know.